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Dirty Reiver 2023
Dirty Reiver, April 22, 2023
The Dirty Reiver is a popular off-road sportive which uses the paths and fire roads in the Kielder Forest. There are several distances, but of course everyone thinks they want to do the 200km route.
This year 1600 or so riders started, which included 6 riders from CCA; Lillie and Adam Swan, Jackie and Stuart Field, Vin Plosky and myself. The rides started on Saturday morning so we drove up on Friday and stayed in an AirBnB.
To avoid the inevitable delays of waiting for people in a big group we split into family units. The Fields, Swans and err… Vin and I had to get ‘married’ for the day. No details were discussed on this, but suffice to say Vin was the patient one in the pairing!
With so many riders a mass start was hectic and remained so for some time. I could describe how it was riding with Vin, but it is perhaps best expressed by music.
https://youtu.be/Y6EcVglnI-M
Was there a Mario Kart character called Vinnie? If not there should be.
So after the hustle and bustle of power ups and avoiding crashes in the early stage we settled into the day’s ride. It was grey. The sky was grey. The path was grey. To be honest my mood was grey. It was hard to tell when it was raining or not as so much grey mud was being flung up by the tyres ahead. The only way to tell it was raining was that it got even colder.
There are many hills on the route. They are grey.
The only colour to be seen was either side of the greyway and that was the constant drab green of the Forestry Commission monoculture.
There was one occasion when grey gave way to white; this was on account of us climbing into cloud. Cold cloud. Cold wet cloud.
Grey returned and continued. In time it did become less wet grey, this meant our chains were dry and making an awful noise. Vin had the genius foresight to bring a tiny bottle of oil; this shared between our two chains was balm to the very soul.
The sun did eventually make a half hearted appearance. Illuminating the rocks in way ahead changing them from dark grey to light grey but now with a dark grey shadow. I briefly saw a view across a small valley flanked by uniformly planted conifers towards a granite cliff; it wasn’t pink granite.
Vin is a strong rider and I am slow on the hills. Despite my suggestions he ride on, he stuck by our pact to stick together. This meant when the route bifurcated to 130km and 200km I felt honour bound to make the wrong decision and follow him on the 200km one.
Various homemade foods were consumed; potato cakes with chorizo, banana bread, rice cakes and oat and peanut bites. Gels were handy too; those sugars can hit the spot.
Songs were sung. Flies got eaten. Grey persisted.
We got back to the event ‘village’ about 11 hours after we left. Tired and, well, grey.
Jackie did not have a great day; I think it is fair to say her bike got damaged after hitting a pot hole very hard which later led to mechanical issues. Lillie experienced a ‘barfarama’. So the other family units ended up doing the more sensible 130km route. Out of the six of us, there were no punctures!
When all the describing is done what is important is we all had a fantastic time. A time of friendship and jokes - special time. I am very thankful to my fellow travellers and especially grateful to Vin for his incredible patience.
Pantone 422 C,
Pantone 425 C, and
Pantone 18-0328 TCX.
Who else is in for 2024?
The Dirty Reiver is a popular off-road sportive which uses the paths and fire roads in the Kielder Forest. There are several distances, but of course everyone thinks they want to do the 200km route.
This year 1600 or so riders started, which included 6 riders from CCA; Lillie and Adam Swan, Jackie and Stuart Field, Vin Plosky and myself. The rides started on Saturday morning so we drove up on Friday and stayed in an AirBnB.
To avoid the inevitable delays of waiting for people in a big group we split into family units. The Fields, Swans and err… Vin and I had to get ‘married’ for the day. No details were discussed on this, but suffice to say Vin was the patient one in the pairing!
With so many riders a mass start was hectic and remained so for some time. I could describe how it was riding with Vin, but it is perhaps best expressed by music.
https://youtu.be/Y6EcVglnI-M
Was there a Mario Kart character called Vinnie? If not there should be.
So after the hustle and bustle of power ups and avoiding crashes in the early stage we settled into the day’s ride. It was grey. The sky was grey. The path was grey. To be honest my mood was grey. It was hard to tell when it was raining or not as so much grey mud was being flung up by the tyres ahead. The only way to tell it was raining was that it got even colder.
There are many hills on the route. They are grey.
The only colour to be seen was either side of the greyway and that was the constant drab green of the Forestry Commission monoculture.
There was one occasion when grey gave way to white; this was on account of us climbing into cloud. Cold cloud. Cold wet cloud.
Grey returned and continued. In time it did become less wet grey, this meant our chains were dry and making an awful noise. Vin had the genius foresight to bring a tiny bottle of oil; this shared between our two chains was balm to the very soul.
The sun did eventually make a half hearted appearance. Illuminating the rocks in way ahead changing them from dark grey to light grey but now with a dark grey shadow. I briefly saw a view across a small valley flanked by uniformly planted conifers towards a granite cliff; it wasn’t pink granite.
Vin is a strong rider and I am slow on the hills. Despite my suggestions he ride on, he stuck by our pact to stick together. This meant when the route bifurcated to 130km and 200km I felt honour bound to make the wrong decision and follow him on the 200km one.
Various homemade foods were consumed; potato cakes with chorizo, banana bread, rice cakes and oat and peanut bites. Gels were handy too; those sugars can hit the spot.
Songs were sung. Flies got eaten. Grey persisted.
We got back to the event ‘village’ about 11 hours after we left. Tired and, well, grey.
Jackie did not have a great day; I think it is fair to say her bike got damaged after hitting a pot hole very hard which later led to mechanical issues. Lillie experienced a ‘barfarama’. So the other family units ended up doing the more sensible 130km route. Out of the six of us, there were no punctures!
When all the describing is done what is important is we all had a fantastic time. A time of friendship and jokes - special time. I am very thankful to my fellow travellers and especially grateful to Vin for his incredible patience.
Pantone 422 C,
Pantone 425 C, and
Pantone 18-0328 TCX.
Who else is in for 2024?
Comments
I’m going back next year
Well written pieces both.
Jackie, I had no idea of your trials & tribulation, as didn't catch up on the Saturday evening. Such grit to stick it out for that duration. Total respect.
Those two CX sections, and general prolonged trail pebble dash seemed to claim a few drivelines on the day. The squealing chains were all over the climbs.
Dear Daniel (DD).
Although we found unexpected common ground, some mutual respect & even admiration for each others cycling prowess over the grueling 200, I feel it is time for an amicable separation from our marriage of convenience.
It was fun while it lasted, and we had some good times.
It's not You, it's me. The Decree Nisi is in the post.
P.S. A Last Tango in Kielder 2024 ?
If its any consolation I have read Martins Strava account of the chain gang. Again its not you. I went out for an easy off road ride yesterday and it knocked me out. Tearing around the Ashwell lanes trying to hang on to a 25mph group would have been well out of my comfort zone.
It was a great weekend. We had a lovely place to stay, the food and company was excellent and the event was pretty amazing really.
This video gives a good overview of the weather and conditionsyoutu.be/mtG2K_uwrs0
I have just repaired Jackie's bike. She did really well to be able to do as much as she did before the gear hanger broke. The derailleur was pretty bent which meant the chain kept coming off the jockey wheel.
I had decided at about 55 miles that I would not be able to complete the 120 miler and be in a reasonably healthy state at the end. (Huge kudos to Daniel and Vincent for completing this) Once that decision was made I enjoyed the rest of the ride much more. It does leave unfinished business for next year. One thing I would change is my gearing. Really struggled up some of the hills. Nothing round here that really compares.
Low point of the day was getting back to the car park to find Lilly and Adam had gone. I assumed that they had completed the 120 miler in a faster time than it took me to do 76. Because there is no cell reception anywhere that far North it wasn't until much later I discovered what sort of day Lilly had had.
Some pictures from the weekend.
Happier times
Not all grey!!
I had some scales with me but was to scared to weigh this. Very heavy!!!